The idea of eloping will inevitably sound like a great choice for every engaged couple at some point. While it may just be a fleeting thought of relief from planning for some, it can be a real temptation for others. Most likely, engaged couples feel pressure to have a nice wedding and reception for all their family and friends, but this may not be what they want. Although family opinions are important, choosing what you and your fiancé want is the most important thing.

If you are struggling with the decision of eloping, consider these reasons:

Money. Weddings can easily be the most expensive event of life. Although weddings and receptions can be held without breaking the bank, it is not uncommon today to spend $19,000 or more on your special day. On the contrary, a couple can have a great elopement and honeymoon, staying in great hotels, eating like kings, and exploring unique locations, all for around $5000 or less. This way, you and your new spouse will still have money to live on when you get home!

Save time. Some couples take more than a year to plan their massive event. This year will inevitably be filled with stress from planning and trying to meet everyone’s expectations. On the contrary, an elopement can be put together in a few weeks or in as little as a few days.

To Have Fun. By eloping, you will save yourself the stress and worry of wedding planning. You will also have a unique, crazy experience that you can tell the grandchildren about.

To Be Unusual. If you don’t like to adhere to the social norm, eloping is a great option. Even though eloping is becoming more popular, it is still definitely the unusual and unexpected way to get hitched.

Privacy. For some couples, the experience of getting married is best celebrated surrounded by all their friends and family. Other couples may want the ceremony to be private and intimate. They may want to be alone with just the minister so that they can focus on each other and the commitment being made.

Don’t elope if:

You don’t think you have enough time to plan a wedding. Although some brides take months to plan, a fabulous wedding can be put together in a very short time period. Also, most friends and family members want to help if they know what to do, so don’t be afraid to ask!

Both of you are not comfortable with the idea. Weddings, like marriage, are full of compromise. However, eloping is big decision, so don’t do it unless both of you want to.

It is a spur of the moment idea. Some couples want to get married instantly after “falling in love,” but no one should rush into marriage. Your actual wedding plans can be spontaneous, but the decision to get married should not be.

Remember:
A small and quick wedding can be just as memorable as bigger wedding where every detail is planned out.

Eloping can be very romantic, a time for just you and your spouse.

Eloping does not have to be just you and your fiancé. You can bring a few close friends and even your parents and siblings.

The choice to elope is a personal one. Choose what you want, not what your family wants.

The idea of eloping is thrown out at some point with every engaged couple, especially when wedding plans get overwhelming. But for some couples, eloping can be a good choice. If you don’t care about having a huge wedding with everyone and their brother witnessing your personal commitment and definitely don’t want to spend thousands of dollars on one day, consider eloping.

Eloping doesn’t have to be a top secret trip. It can involve a few family members and friends if you so desire. If you are seriously considering having a shot-gun wedding and the City Hall doesn’t quite meet your destination dreams, consider these great elopement locations:

Vegas: Obviously one of the most popular elopement choices is Las Vegas. More than 100,000 couples get hitched there every year. In Las Vegas you can have the ceremony in a traditional Las Vegas wedding chapel, a ceremony based on a character, such as Elvis and Priscilla, or a quick wedding at the infamous “drive through” wedding chapel. Las Vegas wedding packages can range from $300 to more than $1,000 depending on what resort and package you choose. Marriages in Las Vegas are easy because there is no wait and no required blood test. However, you must be at least 18 years old (ID required) and pay $55 for the marriage license.

Hawaii is a great choice for a romantic elopement destination. In Hawaii, there are no state or U.S. citizen requirements that have to be met in order to be wed. The legal age is still 18 years old and has to be backed with proper identification. Depending on what island you choose, how extravagant of a ceremony you want, and what accommodations you wish to have included in the package, the cost can range from as little as $95 for the simplest service up to the thousands for luxurious sites.

Florida: For a beautiful, private, beachside ceremony, try eloping in Florida. Locations all across the state provide wedding services. There is no residency requirement, no wait period, and no blood test required. The marriage fee is $93.50. Florida offers some great elopement packages. The Newport Beachside Resort and Hotel (www.newportbeachsideresort.com) in Miami offers a package that includes a beachfront ceremony, a wedding cake, wedding night accommodations for one night in a one bedroom suite, strawberries, champagne, and breakfast in bed, and valet parking all for $699. There are similar packages at other hotels that include a longer stay for a higher price.

Niagara Falls is known as the honeymoon capital of Canada and provides a beautiful backdrop for a wedding ceremony. There are some important things to be aware of if you are planning to elope in Niagara Falls. First, marriage licenses from the U.S. are not valid in Ontario. Buy your marriage license from the Niagara Falls city hall for $100 CDN. You will also need 2 pieces of identification. The city hall is open Mon-Fri, 8am-4pm. Second, you have to have two witnesses at your ceremony, so bring two friends with you to sign the license. Marriages in Ontario are legal in all countries. Although weddings are not allowed in the park right by the Falls, there are many close locations from where the Falls can still be seen. The closest location is Oaks Garden Theater which has pavilions and beautiful gardens with the Falls in the background. Niagara Falls can be an especially good financial choice since you can drive from many U.S. locations instead of flying in.

Bachelorette parties are the last big bash for a single woman. They signify the passing from the single life to being a married wife, and they are a chance for the bride-to-be to relax and have fun with her best friends. But parties don’t just happen, someone has to plan them. This responsibility is usually given to the maid of honor and the bridesmaids. If you are a first-time wedding attendant, you may not have any idea what a bachelorette party should include or how to plan one. Here are a few basics to get you started planning:

Who to invite:
Bachelorette parties are usually attended by the female bridal party and other close friends of the bride. Family, such as mothers and aunts, are sometimes invited if the party is appropriate. If the bachelorette party is not a surprise, ask the bride who she wants to invite. She may think of people you never would. Using the Evite website (www.evite.com) is an easy and cheap way to invite all the guests.

Types of parties:
Here are a few ideas for bachelorette parties:

• Day at the spa
• Strip club
• Nice dinner out
• Party at home with games
• Attend a sporting event
• Weekend away at a casino or other fun location

Details of the party:
What will be your mode of transportation? If you can afford it, renting a limo is a popular choice because 1) it is an exciting and luxurious ride for a special occasion and, 2) renting a limo allows everyone to drink without having to have a designated driver.

Bachelorette parties are usually filled with funny gags and jokes. It is the perfect time to tease the bride about her upcoming marriage. You may want to ask certain guests (or all of them) to come prepared with a funny toast or embarrassing story about the bride. However, make sure the joking doesn’t get out of hand and that the bride doesn’t get her feelings hurt.

Are you going to be playing any games? You need to prepare these and make sure you have all the supplies ready to go.

If you are going out for the party, call ahead to tell the business that a bachelorette party will be visiting. They may have special deals for wedding-related-parties. They may also appreciate the heads up on the kind of customers they will be having for the evening.

How to pay for the party:
It is customary at bachelorette parties for everyone, except the bride, to pay for themselves. The bride should not have to pay for the evening, so be prepared to cover her cost. However, for group expenses, such as renting a limo, it may be a good idea to ask everyone to chip in a certain amount so the one planning doesn’t have to take on the entire amount by herself. Make sure to collect the money a few days before the party so that you don’t have to worry about having enough the day of.

Wedding planning equals stress, especially for the bride-to-be. The endless planning can easily become overwhelming instead of exciting. Bachelorette parties are a great time to escape the non-stop planning, spend some quality time with the bride’s best friends, and celebrate the bride and her upcoming marriage.

In the past, bachelorette parties were often throw on the eve of the wedding, but this, in reality, is not the best time for a great party. It is important for the bride to get sleep on the night before her wedding to look fresh and be alert for all of the coming day’s events. Bachelorette parties the night before the wedding are especially a bad idea if you plan on consuming a large amount of alcohol. So much time and money is spent on the wedding, the bride will want to be able to remember the day without a hangover. Plan the bachelorette party to be held up to a month before the wedding or as close to a week or before.

Hiring a male stripper for the big party or attending a strip club, is a popular way to celebrate a bride’s last days of being single, but it is not the only option. Make sure to consider what your bride would prefer. If everyone attending the party expects a stripper, but the bride doesn’t feel comfortable with it, go with a different plan. Making sure the bride has fun is the most important goal of the night. For another option, try taking a day at the spa. A day filled with massages, facials, mud baths, seaweed wraps, manicures, and pedicures is sure to leave the bride feeling relaxed, refreshed, and pampered. It also provides lots of time for girl talk and bonding throughout the day. If the bride loves to dance, go dancing for the night. If you have an athletic group, go to a sporting event or do something active yourselves.

Make sure to distinguish the bride from the rest of the group. Make her wear something “special” that will tip everyone off as to the occasion of the party. Get her a bride-to-be hat or shirt, make her wear a crazy tiara, or gift her with colorful leis. This will bring her attention all night to make sure everyone knows she is a bride. Hint: It may also help you get certain discounts or free gifts if everyone knows it is a bachelorette party.

Bachelorette parties are also a fun time to “roast” the bride. You can have certain guests prepare funny or embarrassing stories and toasts before hand to share at the party. A certain amount of practical joking or gags are appropriate for such an occasion. A little embarrassment at the restaurant or just in front of the friends is often a fun part of bachelorette parties. It is a good time to share funny stories about your single days. However, just like in every other aspect of the party, make sure the bride is comfortable and the joking doesn’t go too far. The last thing you want is the bride to be insulted at her own party.

Overall, make sure the party is fun, relaxing, and suits the bride’s tastes, and you will have a great bachelorette party!

Before attaching the “ball and chain” around their ankle, most guys want a chance for one last freedom ride with their best buddies—one last chance to act as manly as possible without getting nagged by a woman. Enter the bachelor party. The first requirement of a bachelor party is to have fun, but there are a few other details to consider before partying—such as trying to be responsible and keep the groom out of the “dog house” with his bride-to-be.

One Week Before: Have the bachelor’s party a week or more before the wedding instead of the night before the big day. This is especially a good idea if alcohol will play a large role in the party. No bride wants her groom to be hung over at the altar. Also, since the wedding day can be extremely draining, it is best to allow the groom to get a decent night of sleep instead of partying the night away. If you still want to celebrate the night before, throw a smaller party with less alcohol.

Bar alternatives: Although a popular activity for bachelor parties is hitting all of the local strip joints while steadily increasing your blood-alcohol level, this is not the only option for a good party. You may want to reconsider this choice if the groom isn’t into the stripper/club scene. Instead of a strip joint, try attending a sporting event; after all, nothing brings guys together like screaming at bad refs. If simply watching a game isn’t enough, try actually playing a sport or game such as paintball, softball, golf, or bowling. Having a poker night can also be a manly way to celebrate.

Make sure the facility for the party, whether it is at a bar or friend’s house, is big enough to accommodate everyone attending. Also call ahead and see if the facility has any special bachelor-party deals.

Work out transportation. Whether you rent a limo or van or carpool around town, make sure you have a good way to get around. Limos are popular for the sake of allowing everyone to drink. Rentals, such as 15-passenger vans, can also be fun and are usually very affordable, but you will have to drive yourself. If you don’t have a chauffer, be sure to appoint a designated driver for the night.

Be considerate. Even though part of the fun at bachelor parties comes from embarrassing the groom, don’t go overboard. Consider your groom’s personality and if he would enjoy a few practical jokes. The main purpose of a bachelor’s party is for the groom to have fun, so make sure the type of fun suits him.

Don’t make the groom pay. Be prepared to cover the cost for the groom for the night.

Fathers of the bride and groom are not traditionally invited to bachelor parties. If you are having a dinner before everyone heads out for a night on the town, invite them to this part of the evening. You want the groom to be able to relax and have fun. He might not be able to do this if he is preoccupied with impressing his soon-to-be father-in-law.

You’re now in the midst of planning your wedding. You’ve squared away all of the big wedding planning details, like your wedding date, preliminary budget, number of guests, reception hall and ceremony location. You may have even found and ordered your dress, booked a caterer, squared away a photographer, and asked your guests of honor (the bridal party) to do you the honor of being a part of your big day. Congratulations!

Unfortunately, your work is not yet done. After the 8-month mark, many couples start shopping for wedding cakes, choosing invitations (which will be mailed within 8 weeks of the wedding), ordering “save the date” cards (these can be sent out immediately), and scouring the city for a DJ or live band to play at the reception. You’ll also want to start looking into rentals (tables, chairs, linens, tents for outdoor weddings, etc.) at this time.

At about 6 months ‘til the wedding day, you can start shopping for a florist, though they may not need to have a consultation with you until closer to the wedding date. This is also the time to start planning your rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, if you choose to have one. You’ll want to start thinking about out-of-town guests, and make sure to reserve a block of hotel rooms if they will need to stay overnight. Your groom will want to shop for tuxes beginning around this time, so he can place his order with plenty of time to spare. Have fun shopping for wedding bands, your shoes and other accessories (don’t forget about shoes/jewelry for your bridesmaids), and unique ceremony and reception decorations.

When you pass the 6 month mark, it’s time to really crack down and plan the ceremony. This may include lining up guest readers and guest musicians, and selecting their readings or musical pieces. You’ll want to choose a ceremony style that will complement the rest of your event, whether it is formal and elegant, or casual and laid-back. Many couples choose to start off their ceremony or reception by showing a picture slide-show of the couple growing up. This is something that will require a concerted effort and contacting relatives to get childhood photos together. You’ll also want to decide whether or not you will light a unity candle, write your own vows, or incorporate other personal or religious traditions into your nuptials.

When you are within a month until your big day, you’ll want to call and confirm final payments and delivery details with all of your vendors (florist, caterer, etc.). Pull together those final details if you haven’t already, like buying a guest book and pen, finishing decorative touches, printing programs, and more. Also, don’t forget to visit your city’s government center to pick up a marriage license! Pick up your wedding dress from the alterations shop and take it to a dry cleaner to be steam pressed within a week of the wedding.

Finally, after all of the hard work and wedding planning, it’s time to walk down the aisle. You may have forgotten some details along the way, but the most important thing to do now is relax and enjoy the company of your close friends and family, and especially enjoying the union of yourself to your new spouse. The wedding day will come and go so quickly, but your marriage will last forever—so don’t forget to spend a few moments really appreciating your new husband and savoring the moment.

In many ways, your timeline for wedding planning depends on how long you and your fiancé are planning on being engaged. Couples who want to tie the knot within 5 or 6 months with have their work cut out for them to get all of the little details lined up. Those who leave themselves a year or longer to plan won’t have to move so fast. But that doesn’t mean they can leave all planning to the wind! If you decide to get married within 3 months or less of getting engaged, your timeline will look totally different than the others.

So what are you waiting for? It’s time to tackle the first item on many couples’ wedding planning to-do lists: choosing a wedding date. Most couples want to check with their families at this point to make sure there aren’t any big complications with that wedding date, like competing family functions. Once you settle on a date, don’t start printing up the invitations yet! You’ll have to make sure you can book a reception hall and ceremony location for that date. It’s a good idea to book this as far ahead as possible, a year if you can. But if you don’t have that long to plan your wedding, you might consider asking if the reception hall is open on an off-day (like a Sunday) or an off-time (Saturday morning rather than evening).

While you’re at it, this is a good time to estimate how many guests you’ll invite to the reception, because you’ll need a hall that’s an appropriate size. This is also one of the initial things you’ll need to do in the planning stage. It’s a good time to sit down with your fiancé over a cup of coffee and start making out your dream guest list, writing down every name possible. Then you can do some preliminary budgeting, by asking your parents how much they may be able to kick in for the big day and figuring out how much you will contribute as a couple. This may mean cutting some guests from the guest list, but that’s a natural part of the process. Don’t be shy with telling your fiancé how you really want your day to be, whether than means planning a small family wedding with close friends, or having a grand celebration with the most people possible. Choosing your wedding size is a very important step that many couples overlook during the planning stage, and they eventually end up overwhelmed when things start to look very different than they’d imagined.

Once you get to the 8-month mark, it’s about time to start picking out the big details: like shopping for a beautiful wedding gown, choosing your bridal party (and their attire), hiring a caterer, and scouting out a photographer. It’s important to shop for a gown early, because it may take time for you to order it and have alterations. It’s also important to ask your wedding party to be in your wedding so they can block out the date and make sure they don’t double book. The best caterers and photographers can become booked very fast, so it’s important to snag them in advance.

A “short” engagement is defined is 3 months or less, though some couples may think 5 or 6 months is a short engagement period. While most couples are engaged for 6 months to a year, some engagements drag on for longer than a year.

If you and your fiancé are talking about tying the knot, you may be wondering how long your engagement period should last. The answer: it is completely up to you, and mostly depends on how much time you’d like to not only prepare for the wedding day, but also to prepare for marriage.

One year engagements
If you are planning an elaborate wedding day in your city’s classiest reception hall, you may need to book your wedding date up to a year in advance. Having a year to plan may seem like a good idea—after all, you’ll be able to spread out the tasks gradually so it is not so overwhelming. But you and your fiancé may begin to get antsy mid-planning, and just wish that the wedding day would hurry along. Consider the strain it might have on your current relationship to remain engaged for longer than a year.

Six to eight months
Many couples find 6 to 8 months plenty of time to get all of the wedding day plans in order. Most caterers, photographers, and florists will be able to accommodate your requests if given this much lead time. You may have a harder time finding a ceremony or reception location, but only if you are the ultra-picky bride. You should be able to book a reception hall with this much advance notice—but make sure to get on the ball as soon as possible, or your wedding date might just fill up. While bridal magazines may suggest all couples stay engaged for one year, many others suggest 6 to 8 months as an appropriate engagement period.

Three to five months
If you have three to five months to plan your wedding from the time of getting engaged, you’re going to have your work cut out for you—unless, of course, you decide to keep the ceremony and reception very simple. Some couples who plan their wedding in this span of time like to ask their guests for help in prepping for the big day. For example, you might ask your guests to “pitch in” by bringing a side dish for the reception meal. This will cut down on your need to book a caterer well in advance. You also might ask a few close friends and family to help you with invitations, favors, or ordering wedding-day services, to help speed up the planning.

Eloping?
Couples who choose to stay engaged for only a short amount of time are typically free spirits who care more about starting their lives together than having the most elaborate wedding day. You and your fiancé might decide upon getting engaged that you would rather forgo a huge public ceremony, and just elope. Whether or not you decide to run off to Vegas, you should consider inviting parents or close friends to a civil ceremony or have a post-wedding celebration to invite your loved ones to. After all, many people in your life have probably been dreaming about your wedding day, and you should consider sharing at least a part of your marriage with those who love you.

“The most memorable moment from a wedding ceremony was the exchanging of the vows between the bride and the groom, Katie and Raul. What made it so meaningful was that the vows were said in both Spanish and English to accommodate the bride and groom. My friend met her now-husband while doing mission work in the Dominican Republic and he has only been in the United States for a couple of months. While my friend speaks fluent Spanish, her spouse has a very limited English proficiency. I was so moved by their vows because even though Raul struggled to repeat the English words at the pastor’s prompting, you could see in his face that while he may not understand what he was saying, he believed every syllable of it with all of his heart. Then, as our pastor was struggling to read the vows written in Spanish for the couple to repeat, once again, everyone could see the commitment and love radiating from Katie’s soon-to-be husband’s lips as he repeated words that most of the wedding guests could not understand.” –Valerie

“We decided to hold our wedding ceremony outdoors. Unfortunately, you can never trust the weather in the Midwest and the morning of our wedding, it was raining. We wrestled with whether we should move things under tents or just say “screw it” and have it in the rain anyway. We chose the later. Much to our surprise, the rain stopped exactly 5 minutes before we had planned on starting and the day grew to be one of the most beautiful days that summer…until after the reception (also outdoors), at which time the water began to pour from the sky again.” –Josh

“I asked my dad to perform our ceremony, so he gave me away with another minister presiding. We sang a hymn as my dad stepped up to take over. When he turned to face us, I could tell that something was terribly wrong. Looking panicked, he urgently whispered, "What comes next?" I froze in bridal terror. Fortunately, my husband-to-be had tucked a program into his pocket earlier in the day. He cooly pulled out the program and discreetly handed it to my dad, and the ceremony proceeded as planned.” –Suzy

“When we got married, we decided to choose an interesting day to do so. We started dating on Veterans Day, we got engaged on Pi Day (March 14), so we decided to get married on the 169th anniversary of the day Isaac Fischer, Jr. received his patent for making sandpaper (also, Flag Day). We didn’t tell anyone about this sandpaper reason until after the rehearsal, when we told the pastor we had a different introduction for the ceremony and that he must keep it secret. The next day the wedding begins, I get to the front, and the pastor starts to speak: ‘Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the day that Isaac Fisher, Jr. received his patent for making sandpaper…’ There was the dead silence of confusion; I couldn’t keep it in any longer and burst out laughing, then a few other people started laughing. Our pastor continued: ‘But more importantly, we are here to celebrate the joining of these two…” The service continued in a very traditional manner.” –Stephanie

Some weddings are made up of a typical formula, and it seems you can “just add water” to make the day appear. Others leave an unforgettable impression on their guests. Whether it’s a creative touch added to the wedding reception or just a blunder, here are some memorable wedding moments from real brides, grooms, and wedding guests.

Memorable Receptions
“I attended a family wedding last summer in Chicago. At the reception, they had the most unique thing. The bride and groom had rented/set-up a photo booth—the kind that takes 4 black and white photos in a long strip—for all the guests to get their pictures taken. The idea was to get your picture taken, choose one (or all) of the four pictures and paste it into the scrapbooks they had next to the photo booth. Then you wrote a message to the bride and groom next to it. It was such a great idea and so much better than a guest book!”
–Jana

“At the wedding reception, this couple stood up and did the traditional bride and groom kissing each time people tapped on their water glasses with their fork. However, because this couple is in an extremely tight financial situation, they soon brought out a box that said, ‘Honeymoon or Bust!’ to collect donations in order to get the couple to kiss. Well, that worked for a while, but when donations started slowing down, the master of ceremonies decided to take the collection up a notch and started to involve all the guests at the reception in the kissing game. He went around to each table and guests had to pull out their wallets and place bids on who they wanted to see stand up and kiss each other. They could pay money to nominate someone and in order for that person to get out of it, he or she had to place a higher bid and nominate someone else. Well, this resulted in some major funds being raised for their honeymoon and a wild and crazy make-out session right in our church’s chapel! I think the most memorable kisses included the highly passionate exchange between my pastor and his wife and between the mother and the father of the bride. We were all shocked as the bride’s father whipped off his glasses and the bride’s mother removed her suit coat to have a better vantage point for their very public displays of affection!” –Valerie

“I attended a wedding recently where the bride tossed her bouquet in a very interesting way. As all of the single ladies gathered around to compete for the prized flowers, the bride gave a “one, two, three” and the crowd watched in awe as her bouquet—comprised of individually ribbon-tied flowers—separated into dozens and dozens of tiny bouquets in mid-air. All of the ladies soon realized the joke and scrambled for their “piece” of the bouquet, laughing and sharing the ribbon-tied roses with each other. It was a nice spin on the traditional bouquet toss, because nobody was expecting it.” —Matt