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Answers to all of your questions about planning a bridal shower

By Georgina Clatworthy



Why Have a Bridal Shower?

A bridal shower is a party thrown for the bride before her wedding. The bride's family & friends all 'shower' her with gifts which will help her to start her own household. The tradition of bridal showers goes back to an age when bride's who were thought to be marrying unsuitable husbands, were given gifts by friends to help them set up home as often the disgruntled families would refuse to give a dowry. In modern times, however, bridal showers are fun affairs with the bride center of attention.

Who Throws the Bridal Shower?

The bridal shower is usually hosted by the maid of honor although etiquette would suggest that a close family member doesn't host the party as it looks like they are trying to gain gifts for the bride. However, close family members such as the mother or sister would still be involved & in modern times it is felt that a relative is the most appropriate host.

The host of the shower would usually pay for the party, particularly if it is an informal or casual party. If the shower is formal then they might ask the other bridesmaids to help with costs. Of course, the other bridesmaids should also help with setting up, planning & decorating the shower.

Where to Have the Bridal Shower

The shower can be hosted anywhere, from the bride or bridesmaids home to a restaurant, club or park. Many choose to have a theme for their party & host them at beauty salon's, spa's or other favorite venues. If you cannot pick up the bill for everything, make sure you tell the other guests beforehand so they come prepared. For instance, you may put on the invitations that the shower will be at a certain venue & ask them to book themselves in, for example a spa party. You could also ask them to contribute to a special gift for the bride rather than separate gifts, vouchers or gift certificates are good examples.

When to Have the Bridal Shower

Hold you shower any time from 6 months before the wedding. If you are inviting people from out of the local area it would make sense to hold the shower nearer the wedding date & when they are in town. However, it may be nice to hold it around four months before the wedding, it would provide a nice break from the planning duties for the bride & give her the chance to relax & remember why she is doing all this! It would also be polite to make sure that the guests invited to the bridal shower are invited to the wedding as well. When it comes to time of day, it is traditional to hold it on a Sunday afternoon but really any time of day or night is fine.

Do You Need to have a Bridal Shower?

It is always a good idea to ask the bride if she wants one before planning a shower. Some bride's may not be comfortable with all the attention or don't want to ask for more gifts from family & friends. That said, a bridal shower is good fun & a great chance for everyone to come together & relax.

Who Should You Invite?

When it comes to who to invite, ask the bride for a copy of the guest list first. If you want to keep the shower a surprise, talk to her mother or fiance. Make sure you don't invite anyone who isn't invited to the wedding so the guest list will show who is & who isn't! Be sure to invite close female relatives from both sides of the family, along with the other members of the wedding party & close friends. Traditionally a bridal shower was a women only affair but in modern times they have become co-ed affairs which celebrate both the bride & groom.

What Happens During a Shower

Generally speaking most of the shower will be spent eating, gossiping & opening presents. Food can be anything from a formal lunch to a simple finger buffet at home. Keep a registery of gifts given to make the thank-you note writing easier. Keep the party going with some shower games, particularly if you are having it at home.